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Signs you may be Dealing with a High-Conflict Individual
Consistent Contention/Excessive Litigation
No matter the idea on the table, if it is yours, it is WRONG. You frequently find your soon-to-be ex (STBX) has to have the last word on absolutely everything and constantly baits you to create animosity. They seek out reasons to argue and will constantly engage via text or email to continue the conflict cycle. They may hire an attorney who is notoriously a "shark", they are known for filing a lot of motions and really dragging out the divorce process. They may also intentionally have their attorney drag out the divorce process to bankrupt their spouse, or cause further emotional damage
False Allegations/Smear Campaigns
If your STBX has difficulty with the truth and is dedicated to slandering you, it will make your divorce the perfect storm. They will spin a web of false allegations, using people around them, even friends of your own, often referred to as "flying monkeys", to assist in fabricating or further promoting their narrative. This constant smoke screen makes it difficult for court officials to see through to the real issues. Their lack of a moral compass has you questioning their veracity consistently
Inability to Compromise
Your STBX wants to push everything to a high-stakes deadlock and refuses to ever compromise on anything. They convince themselves that any compromise you suggest will purposely result in a loss for them. They also tend to believe that the more difficult they can make the process, the more you will suffer and the more they will remain relevant.
Violating Court Orders
At the beginning of your case there are likely to be temporary orders put into place by the court, often concerning custody and visitation. If your STBX is violating these orders (even manipulating them in small ways) you can pretty much guarantee they will continue to treat the entire process with the same level of blatant disregard. Contempt will likely continue after the divorce is finalized, resulting in an ongoing set of problems for years, as you try to collect support, facilitate visitation, and follow a parenting plan.
